Monday, November 29. Bonefish Grill. Finished the holiday pages for the website. Nobody else will have even close to this amount of information on Christmas dining. But will enough people find out it's even there? My bedrock principle is that offering the most and best content ultimately wins the game. The machines of delivery dominate the web, and I can't beat the technology of the big guys. I just have to hope that the word gets out about the relative wealth of what a reader will find on my little one-man site.
Mary Ann was up for dinner. "I want to go to the Bonefish Grill, but of course you won't go for that," she accused. But, actually, I would go there. I don't expect as much from the food as she does--Mary Ann actually likes chain restaurants. But the first time we went there I had a good martini, and after today's intense work day that grabbed me.
The novelty of the Bonefish seems to have worn off for North Shore eaters. At least it was wasn't bringing them in this night. The restaurant was about a quarter full. The large bar and outdoor seating area where for many months the restaurant stacked up people waiting for tables were empty. We had a booth big enough for six to ourselves.
"Bang-Bang shrimp, here we come!" I said.
"You know, I was liking you tonight until you said that," she shot back. I said what? "You know you were making fun of this place just because it's a chain. What a snob you are."
"No, really. I was trying to empathize!" I protested. "Isn't that your favorite dish here? Don't you get it every time we come here?"
"I know what you really meant," she said. I drew back a nub, and said no more about the food here until the end of the meal. Which started with a martini whose best feature was that it came with six olives for MA, who loves them. When I ordered the drink, I asked whether I could have an order of French fries to go with it. I am hooked on the pairing of cocktails with fries. (Nothing new: we've enjoyed this at Antoine's, Arnaud's and Galatoire's with their soufflee potatoes for decades.) The waitress thought this was peculiar, but put in the order anyway.
Beating the fries to the table, though, was my order of a fried calamari appetizer. The squid they use were too big to fry properly, and served in large quantity. Not too bad. Then, finally, the fries. "They made them especially for you!" the server chirped. Really? Then they must have put them under the air conditioner vent for a few minutes as the final step in the preparation.
We looked over the menu and found almost nothing local. Lots of tilapia, salmon, fresh-water trout, shrimp of indeterminate origin, and the like. This is my beef with this fish place. How can anyone who lives around New Orleans be expected to accept the same seafood that someone in Dothan, Alabama is forced to eat? Under its veneer, Bonefish Grill is the Red Lobster. A little better and more expensive. But I kept all this to myself.
There was no problem keeping the seared, rare, sesame-encrusted tuna to myself. Mary Ann wouldn't touch the stuff. I liked it okay, but it made me think about the explosion in the number of restaurants serving raw or nearly-raw fish lately. Reason: it incurs a lower food cost for the restaurant than most people suppose. And low food cost is the holy grail for chain restaurants.
For MA the grilled salmon, one of her favorite dishes. It came out with a topping of spinach and bacon, with green beans and spaghetti squash on the side. She ate half of it and threw in the towel. "I don't know whether it's your fault for raising my standards, but I just don't think this place is good anymore." Anymore? It never was, but I kept that to myself.
Mary Ann allowed me to have dessert--a decent slice of key lime pie. While I ate, she told me that she's thinking of going to Los Angeles next week to celebrate her birthday. This idea (or, more appropriately, this controversy) of flying to wherever Jude is for her birthdays has come up every year since Katrina, but she's never actually done it. I decided then and there to offer no advice or indication of my feelings on the matter whatsoever.
Bonefish Grill. Covington: 200 River Highlands Boulevard. 985-809-0662.
